Why Is Compromising Important For A Successful Relationship?
Compromise forms the building blocks which make up the foundations of a relationship.
It is one of the fundamental, core attributes every relationships requires to be successful.
Think of compromise as heavy-duty glue that could hold a 5 feet tall Jenga tower together and keep it intact for years.
The ability to compromise represents the glue that holds every piece of a relationship together and makes it whole.
Imagine your partner has a wedding to go to, but has no viable means of transport.
She asks whether you can take her, but you refuse due to not having enough petrol to last you the week.
She compromises by offering to pay for your petrol to not only take her, but also for the entire of your working week, saving you money.
Isn’t this a good way to compromise with one another?
Isn’t this a good way of working together to come up with a suitable solution for the both of you?
Compromising represents the act of selflessness.
It illustrates one’s ability to change the nature of a problem, to create a solution you’ll both be happy with.
What does a a relationship look like when compromise is not regularly practised?
Complete disarray, two or more people form a unit together, yet all members have vastly different opinions on the direction the relationship should take.
It’s good to have an opinion but where there is passion, devotion and an unwavering stubbornness or unwillingness to understand a situation from multiple points of views (namely, your partner’s), the relationship will inevitably break.
It’s like having a board of directors who would all like to be the CEO calling the shots, all at the same time – whilst still expecting the company to be a huge success.
How you practise compromise in a relationship can make or break it
A common scenario we’ve all experienced before is the “fight for the centre of the living room.”
“No, you can’t watch your football match – I was here first!”
Richard Branson and friends installed the ‘record’ feature into today’s set-top boxes to help stop fights in the household.
However in some relationships even this isn’t enough to quell the thirst of the beast called greed.
Jimmy: “Babe, the UEFA Champions League Final is live right now – can I change it and put your program on record from its current position?”
Monica: “Erm, why can’t you put your programme on record? – I was here first.”
Jimmy: “The game is live though, yours is shown every Monday night and is a series, this is a one-off game. Been anxiously anticipating this.”
Monica: “I really don’t see what difference it makes – whether it’s live or not, you’re still going to end up seeing it.”
Jimmy: “It’s a one off game though, it’s not a series. You know what, forget it – I’m heading to the pub with the boys.”
How To Begin Compromising For A Healthy Future Together
Firstly, they need to sit down and talk!
Communication is just as important as compromising, so make sure you’ve got this component down first.
Couples who struggle with this need to have a thorough review of whether their needs, desires and values in the relationship are being met.
This will allow you to both identify areas of improvement in order to promote a healthy, balanced relationship.
They need to begin understanding that a relationships is meant for more than 1.
Whether that is monogamous, polygamous or anything else.
The ability to compromise is still heavily required in each of these.
If compromising isn’t important to you, then I don’t think a relationship is for you.
Note, I’m not saying you should try to make a compromise in every situation.
I understand that there are some instances where compromising is not ideal for both parties, and should be removed from discussion all together.
However, the bulk of relationship and marriage disputes could be resolved with a little less ‘me’ and a little more ‘us’.
This isn’t to say that you shouldn’t have a life outside of your partner, if anything it is to say that you should, but to be aware and mindful of your partner’s feelings and needs.
What does a relationship look like when the art of compromise is regularly practised?
Simply blissful and peaceful.
You actually look forward to planning and solving problems together, as you feel your opinions are valued, welcomed and both of your physical and emotional needs are being met.